Thursday, May 28, 2009

Thursday at the park

Good Morning and Welcome to the Bench, (Carolin)

Well we have been together for about a half an hour now. But I had to eat my cinnamon bun first. As I type (in the living room, they are in the kitchen) they are talking with Louise about her marriage(my marriage that no longer exists). It was her husbands birthday yesterday (I still have a hard time saying ex), so there is tears, and anger, hurt going on right now. At this moment Cathy is talking practical stuff to Louise about things like mortgages/rent, paying bills. Louise's situation is just horrible, I know lots of women are in this situation but that doesn't seem to bring much comfort at this moment. Cathy is going on wondering what programs our government had can help Louise.

Louise is telling Cathy about what she would like to do for a job if she had her choice. Louise would love to be a firefighter. But at this point there is so many hurtles for her to go through. Louise would like to get her DZ license, her First Aid, and CPR course and a physical by June 15. She is so undecided because the deadline is so close. Cathy is trying to talk Louise in going for it. Even if she doesn't get in this time around it we all think it would be good to try. And if she got her DZ there is other opportunity open to her. I just wish I had a little more time, and of course a bit more money to play with.

Cathy is talking about how her niece is coming over this weekend and they are having a family female high tea. Now the subject has changed to the TV show Jon and Kate plus eight. I have never seen this show but it seems to be the news of the moment. I hear about it every where I go. It seems he went out one night with friends and partied. I don't see what the big deal is. So he went out doesn't he deserve to go out without his massive family? I guess this is one of the fall outs of letting the world watch you on TV. Now they have switched to the Octomom (I hate this nick name it just disgusting and disrespectful) I don't understand why the media is always looking for the negative.

(its me Sunshine)Something happened this morning that was on my mind and I wondered if it would be an issue or not and it is and it makes me sad. Sometimes things get blurred in our heart and thoughts and even though our intentions are good and true someone else can see it as something hurtful towards them. I really wish that the world was not like that. Maybe I am naive at thinking that we could all live together harmoniously. Anyways, we are now talking about Carolin's proposal for the cafeteria at the school. She is waiting to hear from the school. Her proposal is now in and in my opinion it is very good and I believe that things will go her way. She will know something in the next two weeks, hopefully. If it does go through then Carolin will have a lot of work to do over the summer and she will be working come this fall. We are all routing for her. Louise comments on how she and Carolin are both in the same situation right now needing to dish out money and not being sure if there is an actual job at the end of the day. The job hunt and providing for your family at this time in our lives and with such an unstable economy is really hard. We are feeling the crunch too in my family. I have been looking for a job for a year now. I started with many restrictions originally such as school hours and days only but now I have no restrictions when I apply but it still has not made a difference. My husband thankfully is employed but things can change and even if they don't we still really need the money because we are so in the red and have been for sometime. It only seems to get worse.

Carolin is looking through the paper and is laughing about an add for,' The Valley Of The Mother Of God', looking for a full time cook. I tell Carolin that she should apply to that. Cathy asks Louise if she has gone to the library and looked on the board for job postings. Carolin says that there is no board. Louise has requested movies and wants to know how to check to see if they are in. Apparently you need to go online and it will give you this information.

Carolin's daughter is a life guard and has a great schedule. Louise would like for her daughter to consider becoming a life guard and Cathy's son is already working on becoming one and she thinks that it is a great job for their age group.

Louise's son is ready for potty training and she says that she needs to get on that. I remember the episode of John and Kate plus 8 and the potty training. Kate was training the girls only first because all 6 at once would be too hard. She had a chart and stickers and was so excited when they actually made it in the toilet and the kids were proud and happy too.

Cathy went to a board parent appreciation night yesterday and it was nice. There was good food and some nice performances. Carolin asks if this is were her hard earned dollars go. She believes that these programs are not very effective because the principals that don't want parent volunteers in the school don't have them anyways.

Carolin's check for the first payment of school is due June 1st but if something don't change she will not be able to make her payments and anything already made does not get refunded but becomes a donation to the school. Carolin seems to understand this and is OK with it because how can any business run and be successful. Personally I think that it is Not OK if the reason for withdrawing from that school is for financially reasons to begin with. If you can afford the extra money then great but under certain circumstances money should be voluntarily refunded to the family.

Now to children and learning disabilities and the daily challenges. Someone is talking about heart mummers and it seems that it can be a pretty common thing but can be more or less severe depending on the child. Braces are the topic for now and 4 out of our 9 children between the four of us have already had or need to have braces. We understand why they need braces but do we all need to have the perfect smile or should we just let them be themselves. Sometimes braces can be necessary for some children though. I know that my husband says that if he had go back that he would have gotten braces to make his teeth perfect. I don't know why that's even an issue. He already had a great smile.

Carolin is talking about some Walmart mess with Kathy lee Gifford and clothes made by child labour. It turns out that it was a set up by someone who wanted to get a union into Walmart. I think Carolin is referring to a book authored by Kathy-Lee. Carolin says it's a good funny book.

Louise's son just had a big fall and we are not sure where he is hurt, we are waiting for him to hopefully settle down to see.

Everything is okay just a bump on the head...........As I'm writing he's back to running around.
Sooooooo my question of the day is...Should I dish out money for something that's not guaranteed?????? Yes getting my DZ is an advantage, but I really can't afford it right now. I only have a window between the 8th and 15th of June, so I have to get my ass is gear!
What to do???What to do?????

The girls are talking about what to make for dinner, that is always something that comes up.
Dinners are such a pain!!!!!

Have a great week!!!!!


  1. Well I am home now after some errands and had my lunch. Today while 'on the bench' it was a little tense. I was not in the room when the subject first came up but what I did see was Louise upset and crying, and Sunshine was just like our weather right now gray and gloomy, made for a tense morning.

    And here is my two cents for what it is worth on the subject:

    ·Every one of us is entitled to our opinion and we all have to respect that even when we don’t like it.
    ·That for Cathy, Sunshine and myself we are not in Louise’s shoes and though we have crap in our lives we are not also dealing with the end of a marriage. So we need to be patient.
    ·Louise we love you and your husband and though we are not happy with the choices that have been made we are not going to ever pick sides. We don’t know what the future will bring for you or him and your three children need to know that we would never do or say anything that is disrespectful about their father.
    ·If we choice to talk to him in any format that is our choice and we are not being disloyal to you.

    I wish I could wave a magic wand and make everything better for all of us. But life doesn’t work that way. But we need to know that regardless of everything, we are here to support each other and we can trust each other. And as they say we have to stay friends forever or I would have to kill you all cause you know just way too much!

  2. After my second marriage ended I did not expect anyone to choose sides. However one of my sisters chose my ex's side. She did not talk to me for several years and only invited my ex to family events at her home and not me. This not only hurt me but it hurt our son who was only a little boy then, bacause if I was not invited he could not go. He missed out on visiting his cousins at these events.
    The worst thing that friends or family can do is choose side. The worst thing you can do is talk bad about your ex in earshot of the kids. But you probably know this.

  3. We all have situations that are challenging. Some more challenging then others. While we are living through them they seem monumental. The great part of all situations is they get better. There is nothing we can do about it, they just will get better. Our heart can be broken, our emotions crushed and our minds frazzled. The good part is our heart emotions and mind WILL heal.
    We can't do anything about that either, they just will be healed.

    MY situation will happen on Sat May 30th. Now all you four ladies must encourage me not discourage. My favorite thing to do in the spring is to go sailing. I WILL be going sailing this saturday. It will be difficult and may hurt a little but I will persevre. Wish me luck at finding a bargian of two. Here I come Yard Sale Season.