Saturday, May 9, 2009

Little moments........Well here's one. Mother's day is tomorrow, this day is always such a emotional day for me. It always has been. I lost my mother when I was eight, really seven turning eight the next month. It was quite sudden, so very unexpected. That was the first and only time I seen my dad cry. The following few years is really a blur for me, between all the babysitters, friends and family that I stayed with. I really don't remember feeling like I had a home. Looking back it really was like someone came and pulled the rug out from under our feet. We just went with the flow, but I don't remember ever crying or talking much about her. I remember going to the cemetary all the time. Then our life just became routine. Just the two of us. The thing is, we missed her so much. We seemed to put her memory in a glass box and we looked at it, but we never opened it up.
When I became a mother I couldn't keep that box closed any longer. I wished more than ever she was here to share these feelings with me, because only a mother can really understand another mother. I would like to think that she is the reason that I am the mother I am today.
My children are the most important things in my life, and I love them more than myself. I believe she has given me all my love and patience for life's up's and downs. I also must believe that she will give me the courage and strength to be the best person and mother I can be, even when life is so, so hard.
Mothers day really is everyday, because everyday we are the best mother's we can be.


  1. You are one of the most incredible women that I have ever met in my entire life. Your children are blessed to have you loving them so deeply.
    Sometimes music can hep to heal the soul. Maybe this song can help both of us today.

  2. Sorry Louise I guess you can only click on a link if you post something not when you comment. I will put it on my Happy Mothers Day post from yesterday if you are interested. Have a great Mothers Day. I love you.

  3. Louise I believe the bond between a mother and her child extened beyond death. Living with your mother for the first seven years of your life Is what has made you a good mother to her grandchildren.

  4. Louise I have read your blog a few times each day since you posted it. Every time it brings tears to my eyes, I think it was very difficult for you to post it.

    My wish for you is that you take your memories out of your glass box and allow yourself and us (who love you more then you will ever relies) to see Louise the little girl. Please know that no matter how painful, difficult and frustrating writing about the past know that we will be here to support, cry and laugh with you.

  5. You have made me so proud. I read this and I feel so full like I can burst with all kinds of emotions...gladness, because you wrote it, and sadness and pain. I know how big a step this was for you and like Carolin, Sunshine and Mommie said, you are an awesome mom and friend and we will always be here for you!