Today I met with a employment specialist her name was Jingling, what a great name and her name so fit how I saw her, a warm, easy to smile, lovely person. In other words she laughed at all my jokes! Anyway this whole looking for a job thing is a career in itself.
Seems I have my work for “looking for work” cut out for me. She wants me to list all my skills and not my previous employers, on my resume. The 8 years of being home, self-employed and raising my children is a problem. Jingling has given me documentation to read over on writing “The Resume the 15 Second Interview” and “The Cover Letter”. She would also like me to come up with a list of potential companies I would like to work for, including telephone numbers and managers names by the time we meet again. I have three different workshops set up over the next few weeks including “mock interviewing” to attend.
Jingling says I need to sell myself more. I don’t talk about how great I am enough I guess. I don’t know about all of you but I find the selling of myself very difficult and somewhat embarrassing. If I was asked to “sell” my kids or husband (big smile on my face!) I would have no problem telling you just how great they are. But myself it feels a little awkward like I am boasting. It reminds me of when my teenager was around four. We were walking down the beach and she was belting out for all to hear, her version of You are so beautiful to me. In her version she sang “I am so beautiful to me, can’t you seeeeeeeeeeee. I am everything I hoped for, I’m everything you need.” At the time it was very cute and the other’s on the beach smiled and thought she was great. But can you imagine if she sang it now or even more if I walked down the beach and sang her little song. I don’t think I would be getting the same smiles from the beach audience.
I must have sung a similar song when I was young, confident, and proud of just being me. Where did that confidence in myself go, was it a single word or a bunch of little words that slowly eroded the love of myself. And how do I get back to the four year old me who totally adored me, because I can’t see how I am to sell myself to a stranger if I can’t sell myself to me!