Monday, March 1, 2010

Bench Talk: Birthdays...(are they something to celebrate?)

Happy Birthday to you!.........etc, etc, etc...
Is is still a happy day or is it a day you would rather forget?

(Cathy)It's funny because as a kid growing up, birthdays were never about the age. It was our special day and it was celebrated, but, I never recall the emphasis being on the age. I enjoyed my birthdays up until I turned 26. I was good with the birthday number till 36 then I didn't want to celebrate anymore. I felt by 36 I should have it all together and I didn't (and still don't). (Sunshine) I still really enjoy my birthday. I am grateful to have made it to another year and I look at my girls and at my husband and I am incredible grateful for having them in my life is the biggest blessing. For me it's a day to reflect on life and although there has definitely been some very big hurdles to overcome and many more in the future I am sure there is also so much to be grateful for and being given another day of life is always a good way to start. Each day is a new beginning and with it come new possibilities and challenges. As you can all tell bloggers Sunshine's name fits her well, if she wasn't named Sunshine we would have to call her Pollyanna. You took the words right our of my mouth! Hey, I had to look that one up! So if you are being complementary then I should take it as a nice comment, but, if you are using it in a negative connotation then; Oh well, I guess I will just assume that it is the first one. (you are too funny!) ....back to birthdays....
I don't know what changed. Maybe it was a transition year. I was out of university and working and I guess it was the first time I was really an 'independent' adult. I remember wondering if and when I would be privileged to find myself married and with child. That was always a dream for me. To marry and have a family. Old fashioned, yes, however, very enticing for me. I consider myself lucky to have achieved my dream. Being married and having children was always the first thing on my wish list as well. Though I married young and I wanted kids it wasn't my dream. I could see a life without kids and I was ok with it at that time. Now though I love my kids more then anything, I do at times wonder what life would have been like if I had chosen a different road.I know my life would have been different if I had stuck with ballet. I do wonder every now and again, however, I know I made the correct decision to leave dance. I used to talk about being a pilot when I was younger and also joining the army. Well, I know now that my stomach is too queasy to ever fly a plane for a living and I am too much of a big scaredy cat to every join the army. Thank goodness there are other talented people in this world who can successfully do those jobs.
O.K., back to birthdays, again, :), I don't like them anymore. Do not even mention the day to me, wish me happy birthday or anything. I just get so depressed now. All I can think of is, "there goes another year." Stupid, I know. I still feel young and I still think young and I am happy so what is it? If you read on of our earlier posts you know how livid I was when on my 40th birthday I found a huge bouquet of helium balloons tied to our front porch. (and still no one will own up to it!) Nobody has owned up to it cause we can't remember if we did this or not! Cathy, I know exactly who was responsible for that but I will never ever tell. Aha! Just as I was beginning to think it was someone other than you three ladies! Sunshine, was it me cause I can't remember. I'm not telling! Well, that was many years ago and now as I approach what I thought was a number that couldn't exist I don't know what to think or do. I can't do a thing about it, so....
It is interesting that you would post a Monday Bench Talk for March 1st. As we are celebrating a birthday today. It is the little one's (my baby) 10th birthday. She is so excited, we went out on Friday after school to Chapters (bookstore) to buy her birthday gifts. She asked for a book on bugs and spiders. She also asked for sketch pads and pencils (her sister is going to get that for her). We will have her favourite dinner Kentucky Fried Chicken (last year's dinner was wieners and beans) and for dessert she has requested a Ice Cream cake. So I think I have gotten of pretty easy I don't have to cook dinner or make a cake! Happy Birthday to the little one, it is so hard to believe that it is double digits already. Do you think that that means double trouble too? (I only say that because Little Miss Sunshine will be double digits soon too.)
I think when it comes to my birthday is the gift part that frustrates me. This is an opportunity to give a gift and show that you know this person. 8 out of 10 times I am left disappointed. Perhaps my expectation are to high or I am not clear enough with my request. Though I think I am, when I ask for a I-pod like the teenagers, that to me seems pretty clear. What I get is a MP3 and a big boom box. Off to the store the husband goes to return it and get a I-Pod like I asked. Back home and he gives me a I-Touch!!!! I don't want an I-Touch ( I have a blackberry so the I-Touch is redundant). After a few days the teenager and I make a deal she gets the I-touch and I get her old I-pod (not the colour I wanted but closer to what I wanted). And then the teenager give me a musical instrument made out of a coconut (what was she on at the time of this purchase?) and a salt & pepper shaker. The little one gave me a CD 'The Best of Funk' , funk??? any type of music but funk. Sorry, but that is so funny and so cute at the same time. I want to hear the funk! Get on down!! I know I shouldn't complain as there are many women, wives, mothers who don't even get their birthday acknowledged, let alone a gift. Next year I think I will ask for cash! I think that the chances of you getting cash from your ten year old will be a little slim. How much cash will you wish for?
With regards to gifts, sometimes (last Christmas) I was very vocal about what I really wanted as I was talking to my sister on the phone and on Christmas morning, Mr Sunshine came through. I realized that my complaining on the phone when I thought that he was sleeping while we were watching TV works better then me telling him what I really want. That's a good one!
I don't usually get gifts as Mr Sunshine always says that it is my Birthday every day of the year. Little Miss Sunshine always makes me a home made card and many hand drawn pictures. Miss Teen Sunshine may actually break down and give me a hug. This year Mr Sunshine wanted to go out for a nice dinner but I asked him to cook me a really nice lunch/dinner instead. He can make really good meals if he puts his mind to it and takes the time to do it. He was out grocery shopping yesterday and I know what some of the meal will be as I have requested a few favourites as for the rest it will be a surprise. I remember when we were dating and he was house sitting for a friend. He called me from an Italian pasta store and put the lady on the phone with me so that I could pronounce what he was looking for. He made me a beautiful meal with antipasto, soup, Fettuccine Alfredo, veal scallopini with mushrooms, salad and a heart shaped ice cream cake. Then we watched one of his favourite movies, "The Mannequin," and guess what, during the movie, he fell asleep. Some things never change, have we ever had a evening where Mr. Sunshine hasn't fallen asleep? I put that special line in there just for you girls, yes, he has always fallen asleep in person and on the phone! And I thought his favourite movie was The Princess Bride? He has three all time favourites. That is the best movie ever! Why did you watch one of his favourite movies? I never really thought about it but I enjoyed the movie and to this day I remember every detail of that evening.. I started to clean up the mound of dishes but he got up and would not let me touch a thing. We started the evening with some of my favourite music, The Eagles, Blue Rodeo and Michael Bolton. It was really sweet of him and I really appreciated the effort. The meal was delicious! And though this is Bench Talk and we post it on Monday between you and me benchers we are talking on Sunday and today is Sunshine's birthday. Happy 4*&#@!^ Birthday Sunshine. I am sure you will have a wonderful day better than my house as my big plans for the day is to clean the fridge! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR SUNSHINE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!! Thanks girls.
Have a wonderful week everyone. Talk to you on Thursday.

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